Tuesday Taeks

 43 replies

The hawtest of taeks from around the twitterverse!

Welcome back to Tuesday Taeks everyone. Today we’ve got championships, former Chiefs coaches, a new way for Dave to entertain us on Thursdays, and much more. Strap in. Here. We. Go.

Full Disclaimer here: These are meant to be in satire. I repeat these are meant to be taken lightly and in jest. Please do not take offense if you or someone you know gets named in the ‘taeks’, remember all publicity is good publicity. In fact, you’re welcome.

Additionally do not seek out the authors of these ‘taeks’ to ridicule, maim or otherwise harass them. It could be illegal and Seth isn’t licensed to practice law on the interwebz. Worse yet, you might make the following week’s ‘Taeks’. We’ll make you famous.

Hawt Taeks

Every Year. Heck, Every Week at this point.

Should we tell em?

…….All the other NFL teams and a few colleges?

This is a great Two’fer

Done Devon.

Around the Web

Bruh……………………………no

Dave don’t disappoint us.

This last one got me right in the feels. I hope ya’ll had a great fathers day, I know I sure did.


That being said, this concludes this week’s Taeks. I do want to say thanks to everyone for tuning in and also for those who tag me in Twitterland. Teamwork makes the dream work 🙂 See ya’ll next week.

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MidKan Chiefs Lifer
MidKan Chiefs Lifer
Reply to  QuackTastic
06/18/2019 5:23 pm

What I got from that article was Lamar Jackson is not a very good passing quarterback he’s a running quarterback (there was no need to elaborate there everybody already knew that). Baltimore is going to appeal to his strengths and build their offense around a running quarterback. Also it pretty much points out that Lamar Jackson was not smart enough to understand and repeat the West Coast offense verbiage so they had to dumb it down.

Spider
Spider
Reply to  MidKan Chiefs Lifer
06/18/2019 7:27 pm

Well, running backs do take a lot of head shots (sts).

The NFL already figured out how to stop running “QBs”. He missed that bus by a couple years.

severn58
severn58
06/18/2019 4:45 pm

Oh, and potato salad is trash, like gloppy, gloopy, diarrhea.

Fuck potato salad.

MidKan Chiefs Lifer
MidKan Chiefs Lifer
Reply to  severn58
06/18/2019 5:07 pm

Sounds about right

Anthony Stratton
Reply to  severn58
06/18/2019 5:49 pm

I’ve lived on the east coast bruh, ya’ll just don’t know how its done.

Oh, and your “sweet” corn on the cob is shit too. Tastes nothing like in the midwest. Dunno how, but its true.

KCH1EFSFAN
KCH1EFSFAN
Reply to  Anthony Stratton
06/19/2019 12:51 pm

Wait. our Jersey corn is pretty damn good. As far as Potato salad goes, I ‘ll take macaroni salad and cole slaw first… any day

HawaiiFiveOh
HawaiiFiveOh
Reply to  severn58
06/18/2019 6:34 pm

Fuck potato salad

Sounds like something you’d do, yeah.

Pelletman
Pelletman
Reply to  severn58
06/18/2019 6:37 pm

Why do the people you know make gloopy diarrhea potato salad? It’s wonderful.

workingmansdead
Reply to  severn58
06/18/2019 5:15 pm

Cause that’s definitely what I want to read about on a Chiefs site

severn58
severn58
Reply to  workingmansdead
06/18/2019 5:18 pm

Yeah, folks didn’t seem super pumped about it’s posting

Anthony Stratton
Reply to  severn58
06/18/2019 6:14 pm

I feel a meme coming on…

Anthony Stratton
Reply to  workingmansdead
06/18/2019 5:50 pm

Well they’re ignoring the story about Tyreek Hill practicing with a teammate so I guess they got to talk about something…

Tyrone
Reply to  workingmansdead
06/18/2019 8:26 pm

Well that’s great, because they posted it on EVERY FUCKING TEAM SITE too.

BDChiefsFan
BDChiefsFan
Reply to  Tyrone
06/18/2019 9:11 pm

exactly. they didnt post it on the sbnation site. they posted a separate article (same content same everything) on every team site. very forced way to make conversation.

BDChiefsFan
BDChiefsFan
Reply to  severn58
06/18/2019 9:10 pm

lets forget the merit or lack of merit of the subject for a bit. personal opinion aside, i noticed one thing.

they posted the same article on almost all sbnation nfl team blogs. ALL of them, as a separate article. so basically, there are 32 articles, same content, same everything. which seems weird, and forced.

couldn’t they have posted in on the sbnation blog and link to it? it seems awfully forced and very weird way of driving traffic. i guess they want people to talk about women in sports, but they wont let fans talk about issues facing the team.

talk about corporate priorities. stupidity^infinity.

Armychiefj
Armychiefj
Reply to  BDChiefsFan
06/18/2019 10:30 pm

It’s Vox. You were expecting something different?

CHIEFSandSABRES
CHIEFSandSABRES
06/18/2019 3:55 pm

Chargers just keep taeking themselves!

QuackTastic
QuackTastic
06/18/2019 3:42 pm

I’m dying from all these chargers hot takes. Reminds me though of all the shit we talked against the Broncos when we were like 1-7 against them several years back. Guess it just comes with the territory.

QuackTastic
QuackTastic
06/18/2019 3:33 pm

Damn you lowbird for tugging at the heart strings with that last one!

Severely Concussed
Severely Concussed
Reply to  QuackTastic
06/18/2019 4:16 pm

I just recently found out that Step Mothers day is a real thing and it is celebrated the week after mothers day.

It is stories like the one in the article that should show people that step parents can have just a big an impact on a childs life as biological parents. I am very fortunate to have a great relationship with both my biological parents and both of my step parents.

BDChiefsFan
BDChiefsFan
06/18/2019 3:28 pm

listen, Melvin Ingram has NEVER won the AFC west in his 6-7 year old NFL career. at this point, since he wants the impossible, he just wants to bypass wining the division and go for the Superbowl dream.

it makes total sense. dream big, even the impossible.

QuackTastic
QuackTastic
06/18/2019 2:56 pm

They didn’t call Childress a spread game analyst for nothin’

HawaiiFiveOh
HawaiiFiveOh
Reply to  QuackTastic
06/18/2019 3:25 pm

Winner right here.

Anthony Stratton
Reply to  QuackTastic
06/18/2019 3:34 pm

I’m dead.

Leaf
Reply to  QuackTastic
06/18/2019 3:51 pm

comment image

Severely Concussed
Severely Concussed
Reply to  QuackTastic
06/18/2019 4:06 pm

He gave her the old Chilly Willy.

MidKan Chiefs Lifer
MidKan Chiefs Lifer
Reply to  Severely Concussed
06/18/2019 4:32 pm

That made me laugh so hard that it was hard to breathe for about a minute

Cheat Code
Cheat Code
Reply to  QuackTastic
06/18/2019 8:41 pm

I should always read the comments before replying.

BDChiefsFan
BDChiefsFan
Reply to  QuackTastic
06/18/2019 9:12 pm

wow. you win the internet. you win it. forever.

HawaiiFiveOh
HawaiiFiveOh
06/18/2019 2:05 pm

Okay but look at all the beautiful photoshop jobs on that patriots thread.

workingmansdead
06/18/2019 2:00 pm

That QB/TE taek…. SCORCHING

BDChiefsFan
BDChiefsFan
Reply to  workingmansdead
06/18/2019 9:14 pm

every fcuking QB/TE duo is better.

Josh Allen + Charles Clay = better
Mariota + Delanie Walker = better
any 49ers QB + Kittle = better

Dave B.
Dave B.
06/18/2019 1:53 pm

Melvin Ingram and Melvin Gordon… doo-doo #1 and doo-doo #2.

stjoechief
06/18/2019 1:43 pm

The last one definitely grabs you. Love the Patriots Match Game tho. And is that really Brad Childress? And if so, WTF ?

Mahomesisgreat
Mahomesisgreat
Reply to  stjoechief
06/18/2019 1:45 pm

That dad is a winner! Well done sir! Loved the match game too, hilarious!

Anthony Stratton
Reply to  stjoechief
06/18/2019 3:35 pm

Don’t hate the playa hate the game.

Cheat Code
Cheat Code
Reply to  stjoechief
06/18/2019 8:40 pm

Brad Childress
Spread Analyst

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