“Never Rule Us Out!” (KC 33, CLE 29 – post week 1)
(A Chiefs’ poem by 3rdnlong)
“Never Rule Us Out!” – (KC 33, CLE 29 – post week 1)
It was looking like it wasn’t going to be our day.
Our defense was soft, our guys couldn’t play.
Our monstrous O-line had not quite gelled.
It didn’t matter how much Eric B yelled.
We couldn’t get open. We couldn’t make plays.
We couldn’t stop Nick Chubb, Schwartz, or Baker May.
Our first red zone gave us only 3 points.
While Cleveland scored much, and flexed all their joints.
The game got ugly. That Brown had no class
When he even pushed a coach! The refs, blind as bats,
Didn’t even penalize that defender at all,
And only sent him packing when the league gave the call.
Andy Reid had to be shaking his head,
Wond’ring why our Chiefs team was starting so dead.
And the Chiefs slumped into the lockers at half.
At least Chris Jones ended it with a sack.
Oh, to be a fly on the wall to hear
What Andy Reid said to his tired team’s ears.
Whatever he said at half proved good.
‘Cause we came out on fire, and laid out some wood.
The whole 3rd quarter? That one was ours.
While Cleveland had to sit their offensive stars.
A few runs here, a dink and dunk there,
Pat Mahomes launching it into the air.
To Kelce! To Cheetah! To Mecole, and more!
It helped that we were making more than one score!
And then to turn the momentum around,
Niemann recovered a fumble on the ground!
So back again! To that epic game plan
To tire each Cleveland defender, to a man.
More dink and dunk, but ending nice
As Kelce got a grab, and put his man on the ice.
We were now back in it, only down by two,
Until our old friend Kareem ran right through.
Now Cleveland was winning by a score of nine,
With ten minutes left. Cardiac time.
The very next play Showtime pumped up the crowd
By heaving it long, and everyone got loud
‘Cause Tyreek beat his man, then ran in for a score.
And our Chiefs’ were just preparing to go to war!
A three-and-out followed. The Browns were stumped.
Their dominant offense was looking like chumps.
A botched punt led to great Chiefs’ field position,
Then Kelce went ahead with a touchdown reception.
Our defense held tight. The Browns left the field.
Sadly, we still couldn’t make them yield.
Frustration! Our star QB took a sack,
And the Browns, with hunger in their eyes, came back.
This drive would show all, one way or the other,
If the Browns were for real or were going to get smothered.
Baker threw it up! Mike Hughes got the pick!
The Chiefs’ had come back, in a move that was sick.
And now the game’s done. Adrenaline is flowing.
Our season’s starting great, and we’re just getting going.
Other teams are on notice. Now no one can doubt,
Even if the Chiefs are down, you can never rule us out!
KC – 1-0! Undefeated to start the season! Now it’s on to the Ravens!
If you want me to make a song parody of a specific song, just request below in the comments section. And as always, Go Chiefs!