Chiefs’ poem – “The 4th Coldest Game in League History” – 2023-24 NFL Playoffs, Wildcard Week – KC 26 vs. MIA 7 – Coldest Chiefs Game Ever

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“The 4th Coldest Game in League History”

(A Chiefs’ poem) – 2023-24 NFL playoffs, Wildcard week, Jan. 12, 2024 – KC 26 vs. MIA 7)


“The 4th Coldest Game in League History”

This one goes out to all the fans,
The awesome Chiefs Kingdom, one and all,
From the oldest fan ever to Taylor Swift,
From the new bandwagon to the guy who knows ball.

The Kingdom dressed up like Eskimoes
To see the Dolphins and Tyreek Hill
Come freeze their butts off in a playoff game
Against our Chiefs, who are hungry still.

Many came out in the frostbitten night,
Braving the elements, crazy fans!
Visible breath seen from every mouth.
Coach Reid is now Frozen Mustache Man.

Now that’s one thing about playing this game.
Kickoffs and punts were really strange.
The ball so slick it often fell off,
And got kicked short, or wild, or deranged.

The first two plays just ended as drops.
The Kingdom started getting deja vu.
We’ve seen this before, and our hearts just fell
Not knowing that this Chiefs team would pull through.

But lo and behold!  Domination began
As Kelce plucked the ball right out of the air.
Pacheko ran hard and got first downs.
Then Rice caught a score for a Miami scare.

The D played hard.  A three and out.
The offense stuttered and gave back the same.
Miami started moving, and then surprise!
Bionic-arm-Edwards has an INT in the game.

A Butker field goal put us up by 10.
Miami stepped up and threw to Tyreek.
A regrettable score ‘gainst our vaunted Chiefs’ D.
But that was all they’d get this game, this week.

Big plays by Kelce after a catch,
A 4th down run by Mahomes to get far.
Another throw to Rice who was in the endzone
But a penalty wiped out that go-ahead score.

Another field goal.  13 to 7.
A defensive stop with good time left.
Traded three and outs, then Chiefs get the ball
Another field goal and halftime was met.

Chiefs’ D strong on halftime 1st drive
Forcing the Fins to another 3 and out.
Noah Gray with a great 20 yard catch.
Clyde bulls for 12 for a 1st with clout.

The frozen weather brought unusual force
As Mahomes’ helmet broke off with a crack.
Never in the field equipment men’s lives
Had they seen the weather make such an attack.

Another field goal.  Now it’s 19-7.
The Dolphins are trying, but cannot compete.
Chiefs get the ball and make a long drive
And Pacheko runs the ball in, scoring with his feet.

26-7.  11:06 left.
A drawn out drive by the Fins falls flat.
Chiefs get the ball but give it back soon.
Dolphins drive again, but give it back to Pat.

Chiefs’ ball again.  CEH fumble.
Miami’s last chance but they play like a Smurf.
The stadium’s crazy.  All the frigid fans
Along with Taylor get down and swag surf.

Chiefs’ D throughout the game played hard!
George, Stone Cold – 2 sacks, made plays.
Tua’s QBR was 15.8.
McDuffie hit Tyreek and left him in a daze.

Postseason records after this game.
Rashee Rice – most game yards for a rook.
Butker has most Chiefs’ field goals ever.
Pat is leading RUSHER (?!) for the Chiefs ‘cause he cooks.

Another playoff win.  The Chiefs brought their game.
And now get to play either Texans or Bills.
Either one is fine.  I don’t care.  Bring it on!
Kansas City plays lights out and brings chills.

The 4th coldest game in league history,
This one goes out for all the fans!
The craziest Chiefs supporters of all,
Who felt – 27 F in the stands.


If you want me to make a song parody of a specific song, just request below in the comments section.  And as always, Go Chiefs!

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