Tuesday Taeks

 40 replies

We see you trollin’…we Taekin’…

We’ve got some Holiday themed Cheer pumped into today’s lineup. FYI you better get used to it now, I love Thanksgiving and Christmas, the Cheer is equally bountiful and inevitable. Not to mention some Raider shade and dance moves to round out this episode.
Newbies read the disclaimer, Vets you know what to do.

Full Disclaimer here: These are meant to be in satire. I repeat these are meant to be taken lightly and in jest. Please do not take offense if you or someone you know gets named in the ‘taeks’, remember all publicity is good publicity. In fact, you’re welcome.

Additionally do not seek out the authors of these ‘taeks’ to ridicule, maim or otherwise harass them. It could be illegal and Seth isn’t licensed to practice law on the interwebz. Worse yet, you might make the following week’s ‘Taeks’. We’ll make you famous.

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Hawt Taeks

Don’t argue with Ryan, he’s a Dr.

Oh, it’s the Raiders

They lied…

  • Doubt it.
  • Can’t produce much outside of KC? What?
  • Still Doubt it.

When Skip get’s his.

Continuing on with the Cowboys and Co…

I thought old friend Shannon was about to be on the Taek Train until a Redskins fan did the math for us…

OMG, he was right…. lol

Clearly he hasn’t had time, Meg… He’s been too busy practicing these sweet sweet dance moves 😉

Here’s an oldie but a goodie, pay attention to time stamps.

Allen has a QBR of 47…

Flaming HAWT Taek of the Week

Champion and Challenger

Reigning Champ (due to retirement of old taek)

Challenger

Two Three Running backs go head to head to head this week. You Pick the winner.

Around the Web

The giggle killed me, this is gold!

SAY THAT AGAIN!!!

I know I’m not the only one that can relate… Especially after eating all that delicious pumpkin pie.

After that Raider carnage, I am fully ready for some Patriot action. There will be Taeks aplenty. Regardless, let’s just get that W.
Anyways, I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving holiday and I appreciate you stopping by. Until next time.

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Spider
Spider

The first guy is wrong. Almost also counts in poop fights.

VChiefsFan
VChiefsFan

Automatic weapons, Mortar round……. There’s a few that he left off the list.

MidKan Chiefs Lifer
MidKan Chiefs Lifer

Gotta love Tuesday, because we’re not gonna taek it

Paul
Paul

Who’s running this site? It’s been a few hours since they signed spencer ware and there isn’t a thread lol

I wand to complain about something

Tyrone

Paul
Paul

Better not take snaps from Darwin, sick of them not giving him a chance

MidKan Chiefs Lifer
MidKan Chiefs Lifer

Ware isn’t bad, but he isnt going to last is he has many Carrie’s he tears himself up. I’m ok with him, as long as 34 is getting some work.

Cheat Code
Cheat Code

Rewatching parts of the game last night one thing is clear – NE is going to stunt every goddamn down and it’s going to work. Gotta figure out the interior Oline.

Tyrone

HawaiiFiveOh
HawaiiFiveOh

Classy guy all around.

Cheat Code
Cheat Code

Kinda sad about this tbh. Great teammate and a guy who can still contribute. Good luck Chark.

Tony Sommer

I say the Darwin>Charles take is worse. The Flacco>Jackson one has some little scrap of logic if you kind of squint and drink enough Bert’s, but Charles was absolutely dominant. He was one of the few RB’s that made rushing actually worth it in the modern NFL. I do like Thompson, but it’d be like saying KPass is going to be better than DT. It’s just not going to happen.

Sudden
Sudden

The flacco take by clay Travis really isn’t that bad within its context. LJ had started seven games, and was fresh off an embarrassing blow out loss in the playoffs. In his first season starting, he was primarily a running threat with limited passing proficiency. There were reasons to think that may not be an enduring style, and frankly there still are from a long term durability and scheme standpoint.

tsv0728
tsv0728

The fun of the taek is how it ages though. LJ is clearly the MVP frontrunner and Flacco may not play football again. The poster gave us a 5 year window of taking LJ over Flucko. It aged quite poorly. Any assumption that some random kid is going to better than GodJam is just dumb though.

Leaf
Leaf

Context doesn’t matter. If we can take an old tweet way out of context in order to twist it into a narrative we can laugh at, we shall😜

Tyrone

Darwin > Charles was a joke though.

Leaf
Leaf

To be fair, he fully admits he wasn’t being serious. Trolling at its finest

BDChiefsFan

Twitter should ban Davepool for his blasphemous take. ban him!!! BAN HIM!

Boob guy has a bad take. thats as regular as sun rising. not surprised.

Colin Cowherd is an idiot. so is Boob guy.

HawaiiFiveOh
HawaiiFiveOh

HAHAHA Matt Ryan got punked.

WaywerdSon
WaywerdSon
BDChiefsFan

he should have shut down Newton before the season.

when Newton got hurt last season, i remember there was talk Newton won’t be ready by next regular season. then the Panthers rush him back, and he doesnt heal properly.

sad, but Rivera dug his own grave trying to do whats best for him vs whats best for the Panthers.

WaywerdSon
WaywerdSon

i ahve to believe that ownership was involved in that. When you are writing a check that big you kinda wnat that guy actually doing something

starry1

Can you really blame him? All he had to work with was Kyle Allen. I think someday Kyle might be okay, but he’s really not there yet.

Sudden
Sudden

The end of a Rivera

Mahomesisgreat
Mahomesisgreat

Love it. Raiders fans are really funny, but in a sad clown kind of way.

ArrowFan
ArrowFan

Clay has to stay a champion. The Chargers are the best losers in the game ha ha. I guess it is a good argument to have, who is the best team to not go to the playoffs? That is something the Chargers are definitely champions of. The Raiders will probably dethrone them this year and be the preseason fav to win the West in 2020.

kcfreak725
kcfreak725

Look, Darwin Thompson looked good in that limited action and I have high hopes for him, but to suggest he’s an upgrade from Jamaal Charles? That’s blasphemy of the highest order.

BDChiefsFan

Jamaal Charles is the best Chiefs RB of all time. its just that he doesnt have rings. he also has only 1 division title, with shitty Matt Cassel.

if JC had rings or more playoff appearances/wins, he would be a HOF. i doubt he even gets anywhere on his HOF bid.

sigh.

tsv0728
tsv0728

I know we think this about all these guys who played on perpetually shitty teams, but JC on THIS team. Golden fucking God.

Cheat Code
Cheat Code

Hot take – Charles in his prime is the best pound for pound runner in NFL history.

MasterChief
MasterChief

I would agree.

Tyrone

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MidKan Chiefs Lifer
MidKan Chiefs Lifer

I go with Sanders, but if Charles held on to the ball as good as Sanders I would pick Charles.

BDChiefsFan

JC had some fumbling issues, but not as much as you think

BDChiefsFan

not a HOT take. Charles in his Prime was a home run hitting threat on EVERY snap. his vision is the best of all time.

vvet818

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KCChef
KCChef

I’ll eat Pumpkin Pie once or twice a month from September to February … : )

Fire_FG_the_moron
Fire_FG_the_moron

I laugh my ass off 100% of the times I see Matt Ryan get trucked in that video. Also, I dont speak German, but Im fairly certain they say something about the Raiders head coach and call someone a dumbass prior to the snap.

Leaf
Leaf

that video is hilarious. And the tweet is right. The giggle after the stiff arm is straight gold

sportingchiefs

They’re talking about Dennis Allen, the Defensive Coordinator for New Orleans and was the Raiders head coach from 2012-2014.